Ann Cutler, er Coulter

For years I’ve been struggling against the general inability of people to spell my last name correctly. On this list are teachers, politicians, business people and worst of all credit bureaus. I guess the people who you buy something from or are beholden to for 19.7% interest should probably be most attentive when it comes to accuracy in their records. After all, we’re entrusting them to be correct when they slap up the finance charges we owe or when they monkey with our future purchasing power.

Even today this issue frustrated me. I called the frequent flyer desk at AirTran Airways to see why they weren’t crediting me with numerous trips to and from Florida. The way Moesha in the phone center tells it, “Our name fields don’t accept middle names.�

Well isn’t that a fine how-do-you-do? All I use is my middle name.

This certainly causes some issues when I have to travel internationally because my passport has all my names on it. And it’s not as difficult to spell as goshandgollysquakatieiskindandgentle. But other than my birth certificate and passport, I go by my middle name and relegate my first name to either an initial or I drop it all together.

The reason I don’t use my first name isn’t out of country-club attitude. It’s because my father and I have the same name and were born only 25 years and one day apart. That often meant in the past that his credit was put on my credit report – and worse, my college spending-spree credit showed up on his.

So, after fighting with Chevron for five years to convince them that the gas card opened in 1967 wasn’t mine because I was only two and the only thing I was driving was my mother crazy, I finally found a way to manage the name issue. But that’s only the first name.

As hard as it is to believe, the last name Cutler isn’t that difficult to spell. But look at Ann Cutler – the so-called journalist. She spells it Coulter. And how about the legions of people that spell it Culter? Shouldn’t there be a “t� before “l� rule in the dictionary. Or perhaps in Wikipedia.

Maybe it’s mountains and molehills, but you don’t see people messing up Blil Cilnot’s name or Gegroe Buhs’ name. Then there’d be a backlash.

Email us with comments or show ideas or call us at 201-793-8255.

Enjoy!

When rocks blast through the atmosphere, we see a blaze of light and a streak of white. This was certainly the case the other night when the Leonid Meteor Shower was visible from the Northeastern United States.

Or perhaps I should say the meteors WOULD have been visible had they not been blocked by cloud cover?

This was the first time in a few years that I was really excited to wake up at 12AM and bolt outside into the cold. And I was so excited that I hopped in the car and drove frantically westward to see if I could reach the edge of the clouds for a clear glimpse of these atmospheric carvers as they burned up or skipped along the top of the world.

The other time that I got up at Oh-Dark-Hundred to see the meteors was in the fall of 2002 or 2003. Fletcher was just a puppy and somehow I convinced Ben to come with me to the High School field at 3 or 4AM. That night we saw bunches of shooting stars, but not this weekend.

As you have already guessed – mostly because I just said that I WOULD have seen them – I didn’t get to see any shooting stars on Saturday. The closest I got to seeing a shiny rock was the photo of sarcophakatieebullient’s new engagement ring.

She and Ben announced their commitment to one another under a clear evening sky in eastern Massachusetts a week or so ago. They were blessed by the presence of stars, those in the sky and those in their eyes.

But before this gets so sickeningly sweet that you want to smash your Apple iPod-brand MP3 listening device to the ground and stomp my melodious voice, I want to bring you back to earth. I did get to see ONE meteor or piece of space debris on Sunday night/Monday morning.

Even though my timing was off, I did see one bright streak of light go under the little dipper at about 12:42AM Monday. You see, had I read the news reports and astronomy guides correctly I would have known that the entire meteor shower was only taking place Saturday evening into Sunday morning. I just got lucky.

And although I’m loathe to put her real name out on my sites and in my podcasts without some camouflage, I want to say that Ben got lucky too when the star in his world – Katie – said yes to his proposal.

Keep thinking and I’ll talk to you again during the next Bowl of Cheese.

Hey - got an idea or a comment for Bowl of Cheese? Send it to me via email or call the Talk line at 201-793-TALK. Here's episode 8.

Jeff Cutler - not a killer

Keep thinking...

Here's the full text of episode SEVEN.

If you want to contact me, send an email or phone me. The new Bowl of Cheese phone number is 201-793-TALK (8255).

Keep thinking!!

My happy place

If you’ve visited my room – or rooms – any day since I was oh…11, you know that I have a tendency to be an organized pack rat.

The fact that people can’t understand how the mountains of clothes, toys, gadgets and junk are organized is their own failing that should be discussed with someone at an hourly rate.

Keeping stuff around me is a comfort but I know where to draw the line. I won’t keep clothes that I hate or that don’t fit me.

Well, except for that Miami Dolphins’ jacket from when I was nine.

Or the crate full of Beanie Babies that have got to be worth something. I’m just afraid that when they discover Princess Diana alive on some Caribbean island, my collection will drop in value.

But I draw the line at lawn clippings…or technically my lawn. That’s right, I’m against keeping extra lawn or leaves around the house.

Evidently my neighbor didn’t believe this to be true when he mowed my lawn the other day.

That’s right. To the complete horror of my mother and the family name, I had let my lawn get so long that he was losing his children in it, so he took out his mower and cut a swath through the jungle next to my house.

I wouldn’t be annoyed with him for doing this (and actually I’m not), but why couldn’t he finish the lawn. By mowing 1/3 of my yard he compelled me to mow the rest of it.

Stay with me. The trouble here is that it’s NOVEMBER and I had planned to let the snow take care of the extra grass. The fact I hadn’t mowed since September shouldn’t be an issue. It has been cold and the lawn growth has slowed considerably over the last month.

So on a bitter cold November afternoon, some guy I hired had to suffer while mowing my lawn while I took inventory of my other stuff.

Next thing you know, my used golf ball collection or hundreds of computer floppies will be targeted by some well-meaning interloper.

And that won’t make this a happy place at all.

And another post is up. It seems that Bowl of Cheese is just cruising along. Unlike David Sedaris who started with public radio and moved right into fame, the journey here might be a little harder. But not impossible.

As you know, if you're part of the podcasting community or just a smart person, my goal is to build Bowl of Cheese into a commentary column that makes people think on a regular basis.

If you have an idea for something you want me to rant about - or if you want to rant about something yourself - just drop me an email or give me a call - 201-793-TALK. I'll get back in touch with you promptly and find a way to get you on the show or find a way to incorporate your genius into mine.

Until next time, keep listening and keep thinking.

Jeff

Here's the fifth episode of Bowl of Cheese. If you're enjoying these shows please send me an email or leave a comment in the show notes.

Also, please go to podcast alley and vote for Bowl of Cheese.

If you have any interest in submitting an idea for Bowl of Cheese or giving your own Sedaris-esque commentary, contact me via the email above or put a note in the comments.

Until next show, this is Jeff Cutler saying, "keep thinking!"

Here's the fourth episode of Bowl of Cheese. If you're enjoying these shows please send me an email or leave a comment in the show notes.

Also, please go to podcast alley and vote for both Bowl of Cheese and A Life of Play podcasts. It will make me famous and maybe I'll take you with me to the big city!

Chat soon,

Jeff

Wow, now even Framingham, MA - right next to Natick, the home of Doug Flutie - has seen fit to ban playing tag in their playgrounds.

Enjoy this episode and send me your comments. Email me or leave a note at my blog.

More to come...

**Look me up on podcast alley and vote for both Bowl of Cheese and A Life of Play. THANKS!

Here's episode TWO of the Bowl of Cheese podcast.

If you want to read along with me, go to my blog and look for the post that corresponds with the words that are coming from your speakers.

Got an issue? Leave a note on the blog or send an email to 'podcast' at bowlofcheese.com.

More to come...

Here's episode ONE of the Bowl of Cheese podcast.

If you want to read along with me, go to my blog and look for the post that corresponds with the words that are coming from your speakers.

More to come...

The commentary will begin soon, so stay tuned!

In the meanwhile, go visit my blog to see past comments in the written realm.

As we go forward I'll be posting a written comment AND a podcast simultaneously. So you can enjoy the piece at home, at the office or in your car.

Each podcast will be about four or five minutes and will hopefully make you smile, cry or anything in between.

Thanks!

More to come...